Friday, September 26, 2008

To discuss a letter to TiVo

Dear TiVo:
Dude, you’re the best.
This week, all because of new girlfriend related time, I have missed the following premieres: Heroes, How I Met Your Mother, Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half Men, House, The Office and 30 Rock.
All of them are resting right now in your digital bosom. And when I go to watch a bunch of them in a marathon viewing tonight by myself, you won’t be resentful that I spent the past nights cuddling in the bosom of another woman. You won’t nag me about how I neglected you all week, even though you put your sexiest TV on and stayed up all night waiting for me.
Sure, we’ve had our rough times. There was the occasional misfire on your half, when you forgot to record a season finale or two and I threatened to go Office Space on you. But you’ve made up for it, by letting me rewind a touchdown play, fast forward through commercials for Oxiclean, or pause when a friend spots gratuitous cleavage unrelated to plot, also known as every episode of "Ghost Whisperer."
So tonight, TiVo, it’s all about you and that fun little “bloop” sound you make as I scroll through your brightly colored options. I know other DVRs will be jealous. But its just you and me, TiVo. I promise I’ll fast forward through Worst Week Ever after Two and a Half Men is through.


P.S. If you forgot to record The Office I will #%¢#% murder you.

Double Post Script: I'm sorry for making you record Sunset Tan every week. You know I'm addicted to it. Those Olly twins just never learn their lesson. And we all know Nick is going to come out of the closet any day now.


Miss Tiff said...

I can't believe you missed all of those premieres.. But, I'm sure you were having a good time this week so it's all worth missing them.. just thank God for TiVo. I know I do. Have fun with the TiVo tonight catching up on all the shows you missed.

I hope it didn't forget to record the Office last night. That would just suck.

alexis said...

When it comes to The Office, work doesn't even matter. I was supposed to be done at 9:30pm, then drive 30 + minutes home.

Oh no, I walked in the door at 9:03pm and enjoyed myself, teared up, laughed and found a new quote for my myspace.

SouthernBelle said...

So THAT'S what TiVo is for. Sweet.

Married people just schedule Business Time *around* their favorite TV shows. LOL.

; )

sj said...

i can't believe i missed the office. i was completely out of it this week.

i barely managed to catch the season premiere of grey's anatomy and i LOVE me some mcdreamy.

i did however already set the DVR for pushing daisies.

and fyi - i've never seen sunset tan but did catch a commercial and really thought that it said something about the "Oily" twins.

Lainey said...

'30 Rock' doesn't start until the end of October, FYI.

I didn't want you to suffer the same type of pain and confusion that I experienced last night. After several deep breaths and many iterations of the word "fuck", I went online and discovered that I hadn't actually missed it - whew!

gracie-mel said...

I must be a loser, but what is Sunset Tan??
I thought you had caught me up on all the good shows, i.e. Always Sunny and Cracked up in Philladelphia.
And yes, the Office was great, and gasp-inducing. Hope you like it!

bex said...

How I Met Your Mother is a spectacular show, but I'm a season behind because I wait for them to come out on dvd. Then I go into hibernation to watch them all at once.

bianca said...

Oh how I heart tivo. There have been many a night when people ask me what I'm up to and I say "I'm on a date with tivo." But I figure it's ok because I'm on the date with my fiance too, so it's not like I'm cheating.

...love Maegan said...

oh how I love my DVR! I too have shows from last week I haven't gotten to see yet ...but I made time for THE OFFICE ...come on.

A fair fairy said...

hm. This TiVo sounds like a slut.

Anonymous said...

DVR technology, including, but not limited to TiVo, is one of the best inventions of all time. Right up there with fire and the wheel.

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