There are several words and ideas that I think should come back into vogue... actually, I think En Vogue should come back in vogue. They were good.Other possibilities that I would like you to work into your everyday vernacular and activities:
- "Sire" and "beget": I'm tired of rappers saying they make the magic happen in the bedroom. What if Ludacris said, "I want to, sire sire sire from your head to your toes." That has a more royal feeling to it. And beget? If it's good enough for the Old Testament, it's good enough for me. More begetting should happen-- just remember to practice safe begetting. If you forget to safely beget, you'll regret the wrecked beget.
- Town criers: Although this position would technically require the end of my employment as a newsperson, wouldn't it be amazing to get your news from some dude reading off a scroll on Main Street? Especially if it's gossip news: "Hear ye, hear ye. The royal family has decreed that Amy Winehouse has once again been caught smoking crack."
- Being known by who your dad is: I'd be Andrew, son of William. Doesn't that just sound more impressive? It used to be that all guys were known by their fathers, out of respect. Now guys are known by their jobs, or, more accurately, by their Facebook page. "Andrew, status In a Relationship."
- The military draft...just kidding.
- Fighting wars using only hand to hand combat. Enough of this nuclear weapon, machine gun, bomb stuff. The death tolls would be a lot lower if it was just straight street fighting like the old days with sabers and shields. And you know what? China would smoke us. We better get Chuck Norris enlisted. His fists are registered.
- Balls: No, not sports equipment. And not testicles either, pervert. I mean the dancing kind. Where you dress up. And the whole town is invited. And the prince needs to find the girl with the glass slipper. Who wouldn't want to attend that? You're genuinely excited at the thought, aren't you?
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12 comments:
Diane, daughter of John, just Windexed her glass slippers in anticipation... ;)
My dad has a "That's Pat" type first name, but really it's more associated with being a female name than a unisex name; regardless, I'll pass on that one. Sire? Beget? En Vogue? I vote yes on all three; "Hold On" was a good song.
Kimberly daughter of William (though not the same William) would also like to see:
Men and women wearing hats. Not trucker hats cocked sideways, nor wool hats in the wrong weather, but nice hats that match nice overcoats. My grandmother says the world was a better place when men wore hats and ladies wore gloves. Of course, they still had Commies, polio, and 'duck and cover' drills. But still.
a ball would totally rock. Then I could pull out all those formal dresses from my closet. I've been considering wearing them to work, but since I work in mental health I may get committed.
BTW, when's your next Q&A?
a ball. so. right on. balls and cotillions and a "season."
i just had a scarlet o'hara moment.
and i would love to bring back the town crier position, although i agree, i'd miss my local paper. and having for my local paper, i would say that really, the position already exists, albeit in a small, less public way in the form of office gossip. and nowhere have i heard better gossip than in a newsroom.
We here on the Cape, my dear sir, still have balls, thankyouverymuch. You know, the Mermaid Ball, the Academy of Performing Arts annual Christmas ball. Such is the nature of the awesomness that is Cape Cod. And occassionally, if you're lucky, you might see someone dressed up in period outfits...and that's kinda like a town crier....????
mental note: move to cape cod.
Nowadays, our "town criers" are our radio djs. At least....that's who tells me when Amy Winehouse snorts crack.
Andy - I think people would be much less willing to go to war if it was all fisticuffs instead of just pressing buttons. I'm with you on that one!
shieldmaiden69 - I'm with you on the hats. I looove a man in a hat. Ne-Yo is a good example of how sexy it can look, esp. in his video for the song Closer. As a plus, hats are a good cover for receding hairlines ; )
I love wearing hats too. I have this huge-brimmed black straw one I always get compliments on every single time I wear it. Which is not that often due to hat-hair... hmmm...
SJ - I would LOVE to attend a ball in our fancy frocks! Possibly at Cape Cod - it sounds like the kind of place that would have awesome seafood too ; )
I cant believe you actually did find a way to use the term " sire " on your blog - well played sir!
However, i generally find the term " sire " is used in reference to horses these days, and i dont want any children of mine compared to a horse. I'm having these terrible visions of little Amy's running around with huge, bad teeth and an odd taste for hay...
Ok, so I read this last night and I swear I posted a comment. I think I'm losing it Andy..
Mine would be Tiffany daughter of John. Oh and so bring back the balls. A reason to break out the formal dresses is always a great idea in my book...
When I studied abroad in Australia I went to like 4 balls in 5 months! Australia is pretty much the best country. They use old-timey sounding words, too, like "whilst."
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