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Monday, November 9, 2009

To discuss it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas?

Dear Thanksgiving:

On behalf of jag-offs everywhere, I apologize. I haven't seen this much thunder stolen since Urkel joined "Family Matters" and Carl Winslow became an afterthought.

Once Halloween is over, it's no secret marketers and businesses want to remind us it's the holidays. Commercials tell us to shop now for Christmas before it's too late. In reality, it's too late on Dec. 26. It's not too late Dec. 24.

But the commercials aren't a big deal, and to be expected. I can even look past Jim Carrey's "Christmas Carol" movie coming out last weekend, hoping without cause it could be better than Muppet Christmas Carol.

What's not to be expected is for people to jump the gun and start decorating for Christmas now, before anyone has carved a turkey, watched Al Roker flag down parade floats or watched the Detroit Lions in their annual Thanksgiving Day loss.

On Friday, I was driving down an autumn foliage covered road. Fall was in the air (and likely H1N1, but that doesn't have pretty leaves).

And then what to my wondering eyes did appear, but an inflatable Santa Claus, lights and general Christmas regalia spread all over the side of a house and lawn, inviting me to have a Merry Christmas.

Full holiday decorations. Nov. 5.

And then yesterday, Thanksgiving, you remember what happened? I drove through a town that had jack-o-lanterns decaying gracefully on doorsteps, hoping to scare off children one last time with the threat of a bacterial infection. I saw brown banners on light posts adorned with leaves. I had football on the radio, and leaves falling from the trees. It was fall in all its splendor.

Except for the garland and Christmas bells hanging throughout the town.

So, Thanksgiving, it seems once again you are the redheaded stepchild of holidays. You are a mere formality to Black Friday, a roadbump to Christmas morn.

Sorry about your loss. Maybe next year, try adding gift-giving to your holiday's list of traditions, right after the turkey feast. Steal the thunder right back from Jesus. He already gets two holidays a year, anyway.

Sincerely,
Wild ARS Chase

12 comments:

Ben said...

I got reamed out on Twitter last week for expressing glee over the return of Starbucks holiday drinks. Apparently that is on the same level as leaving Christmas Lights up year-round and smothering kittens with bags of sand.

BeckEye said...

I just want to say thank you for using the word "jagoff," but it's not hyphenated. I'm a Pittsburgher; trust me.

Kellie said...

This is something that bugs the crap out of me. And I don't think I'm easily perturbed. But I saw Christmas decorations up at Target mid OCTOBER. It's just complete overkill.

And then yesterday one of my friends stated on Facebook that she put her tree up this weekend. I almost defriended her right then and there.

Soda and Candy said...

"So, Thanksgiving, it seems once again you are the redheaded stepchild of holidays." hahahahahahaha

The Christmas panic starts even earlier in Oz, where Halloween is barely recognized and Thanksgiving of course non-existent. Christmas decos can go up as early as mid-October there.

sj said...

you know... i love thanksgiving and all, but mostly, i think of it as "the official start of the christmas season."

i'm sorry. but there, i said it. i freaking love the holidays, and i lump thanksgiving right on in there. it's like christmas lite - where the gift that keeps on giving is the indigestion from too much of everything delicious.

Amy xxoo said...

Although we dont celebrate either Halloween or THanksgiving here in Oz - i'm in total agreeance.

Department stores start stocking Christmas merchandise in SEPTEMBER, and because my boss is such a Christmas fanatic i have been working in a fully decorated office for a week now.

Despite my protestations that its bad luck top decorate before Dec
1st, she's all Christmas cheer. Bah humbug to that!

P said...

Yeah, I always get disturbed in mid September when Boots the Chemist gets in its Christmas gift range. Heck, it's not even my BIRTHDAY yet at that point!!!

I've heard my hometown already have their christmas lights up. Seriously??? Why???

Okay, for me the whole of December is pretty much Christmas, but not November, October and September too...

Candy's daily Dandy said...

I am sure Mr. Thanksgiving whole heartedly appreciates your sympathy to his plight.
He may even send you a thank you to post on your fridge.


That was eloquent and well written. Nice work.

amindinmotown said...

My house is decked out for the "harvest" season right now, so at least I'm not ignoring Thanksgiving. I really might be the only one though.

P.S. The ad on the bottom of the page on my Reader was for North Carolina wines. How weird.

gracie-mel said...

my fear is that if we as a community keep building up the Christmas holiday season like this, it will turn us into Chrismas-zillas who have this crazed look in our eyes from the 24/7 non-stop kid-singapalooza.
Yes, we will be akin to Bridezillas in the worst ways, and when the blessed day arrives we'll be like: all this hoopla for *this*???

Jenners said...

I know!!! Poor Thanksgiving just gets shoved aside for bright shiny Christmas. It isn't right. NO CHRISTMAS STUFF UNTIL AFTER THANKSGIVING. In a futile effort to stem the tide, I am considering putting a giant inflatable turkey on my lawn.

*~Dani~* said...

My town is very confused. In the middle of an intersection they still have haystacks and corn stalks while right next to that they have garland with red ribbon wrapped around a street light.

Nowhere is a turkey seen, however. RIP Thanksgiving.

word verification = trimm (evidence that Thanksgiving has been cut short, we cannot even use the full word "trimmings" as in dinner with all the trimmings. So sad).

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