Tuesday, June 1, 2010

To discuss advice on Facebook friend etiquette

I'm not sure of the proper etiquette in this social media situation, as I was raised by a pack of wild hyenas*. Please help:

It's getting to the point on Facebook where people who would never normally get on it - bosses of mine, for example - are now on it, and the point that it's been around long enough that people I only knew as children have now grown up and are on it.

So what do I do if one of them friend requests me?

1) Pretend I didn't hear their request, in hopes they think the request is done verbally
2) Click "Ignore" and hope they forget they asked me in the first place
3) Click "Accept" and block access to them seeing anything on my profile as if they are a child molester
4) Petition Facebook to add a new "Indifferent" button that I can click, so that they know I am acknowledging their request, but that I'm not too thrilled about it
5) Murder a kitten, as who would care about a Facebook friend request with that going on?

There is no good protocol for these situations, and yet I feel most of us have run into them. People who you never see aren't a huge issue - you can ignore them - but coworkers are another (not that I'd be dumb enough to do something like this girl). None of this applies to people you went to school with but who you barely know who now want to be your FB friend so they can see if their life turned out better than yours. We don't accept those people.

Thoughts? Concerns?

If any of you want to be my FB friend, by the way, e-mail me at wildarschase dot yahoo dot com. I promise I won't ignore you. Unless I do.
* And my uncle, Scar.**

** That's right, I made a Lion King joke. And guess what? Give it a few weeks and I'll be making Toy Story jokes.***

*** Somebody poisoned the waterhole.****

**** I had the Woody doll when I was a kid. That's what he said when you pulled his string.*****

****** You can't say "poisoned the waterhole" now. It's a matter of bioterrorism.


Alexis said...

That's a toughy! I don't have a FB but when I had a MySpace and undesirables would Friend Request me, I'd let the request sit in limbo for a really really long time and then I'd delete it. But if you have to choose, I'd say delete your FB all together.

stealthnerd said...

I would be behind your petition for an Indifferent button.

Oh, and as far as awkward friend requests and what to do about them, well, let me just tell you that I would not accept my mother-in-law as my friend. I mean, I emailed her to let her know, but still. She doesn't need to see pictures of me doing keg stands or that my friends all call me Booty (still).

Soda and Candy said...

hahaha, it's easy. Just friend them and then unfriend them a week later. It doesn't notify of unfriending, and they'll probably forget after they throw that first sheep at you or whatever.

Herding Cats said...

Past students of mine are starting to request me. I ignore because I am sooo not okay with that!

Amy xxoo said...

Its a hard one, but i like to go for the " Accept " button and then kind of ignore any messages or wall posts they send you. If they ever bring it up you only have to say " I'm hardly ever on facebook! ". Of course, this may involve not updating your status for a few weeks...

Jenners said...

How about this .. what do you do when you get a Facebook friend request from your EX-HUSBAND ... your current husband isn't too keen on you accepting the request. That is my current problem. I'm thinking of just quitting Facebook altogether .. I never do anything with it anymore.

I'd just let the requests sits for all time.

kisatrtle said...

recently I had a crazy co-worker request my friendship and I thought "this is odd and can't be good" then a few weeks later some other friend of mine wrote something on my wall about the crazy one not knowing she was my "friend". Needless to say I didn't see it before crazy did and she went a little nuts. I deleted crazy as my friend but I've regreted accepting to begin with. I'm starting to hate Facebook. I say accept and delete in five days. Unless, of course, this entire post is all about me.

Cadence said...

So, I had a similar problem, working at a college...because they all (duh) wanted to be my besties on FB, and that's probably not smart.

I just made a separate list for those people, and gave them very limited access to what they could see. I suggest that route.

spleeness said...

haha! "people you went to school with but who you barely know who now want to be your FB friend so they can see if their life turned out better than yours."

Actually I really like Soda and Candy's idea. Going to try that.

LiLu said...

Two words: Limited. PROFILE.

Katie said...

I will only comment on the Toy Story reference. My toy said "I'm woody, howdy, howdy, howdy."

True story: I took mine apart, found the sound piece and replaced it with "I have a Woody, Pound it, pound it, pound it." and gave it to my friend as a birthday present. I was never invited over to his house again, which sucks because his mom? Best meatballs ever. And she had a nice rack too, from what I remember at 12.

Doniree said...

Something about "toy woody" and "that's what he said," in the same sentence, and I totally forgot the rest of what I just read.


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