To discuss me becoming a (founding) father

I expect Father's Day cards from all of you this year.

This summer, I'm going to be a Founding Father.

Yeah, that just happened. Pick up your jaw.

After rave reviews* from my performance as Max Detweiler in "Sound of Music" last summer doing community theater, I couldn't resist auditioning for a show again this summer.

I auditioned for a new company, and these guys do professional (read: actors make some bank) shows and had just started a new dinner theater, so I was half-confident and half expecting the audition to end up like one of those "Center Stage" girls with me crying about my fat thighs or something.**

The show: 1776. Now, if your Canadian (waddup, Ben?) or Australian (waddup, Amy?) or Scotland, (waddup, P?), 1776 may mean nothing to you beyond the number of times Kate Gosselin's kids have asked "Where's mommy?"***

But for Americans, it's the year we declared our independence from England's insistence that we spell theater as "theatre." And taxes and repression or something.

The musical focuses on the Continental Congress as it debates the Declaration of Independence. I'll be playing Roger Sherman (at right), the representative from Connecticut and a member of the committee responsible for writing the declaration. Ironically, Sherman sings about how he won't write the declaration because he's "not a writer."

Ha ha ha! Haha... he... umph... This is where you all say, "Yeah, that's so funny because Andy is such a good writer!"****

As there are 25 guys and only 2 women in this show, it's a total sausage fest, but a patriotic, all-American sausage fest. I'll love being back on stage, and I get to wear hose, which is slimming horrible.

Here's the catch: The show runs from late June to early August, every weekend. There goes my big summer plans to ... well, I was going ... and there there was that thing ... I was planning ... aw, hell, I was going to eat cheeseburgers and watch House Hunters reruns.
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* From my mother
** I better stop referencing the ballet drama Center Stage if I am going to keep doing this heterosexual thing. But it's such a good movie! (Stop it, Andy!)
*** Mommy is trying to be famous, kids. But here's a photo reminder in case you forget what she looks like. That hairy man she's with is your new daddy.
**** Such a good writer I have to rely on asterisk jokes.