To discuss catchphrases that are so fetch

I think it's about time I had my own catchphrase.

Think about it. All the greats have their own.

"Did I do that?" - Urkel
"How rude!" - Stephanie Tanner
"Mission Accomplished" - former President Bush
"It depends on what the definition of 'is' is"- former President Clinton
"*crickets chirping*" - Spencer Pratt's head

Making a catchphrase is difficult business, though. Just like Gretchen trying, in vain, to make "fetch" happen in Mean Girls, you can't just force it. There has to be a natural progression of things. It's an organic process, much like how how Will Smith would yell, "Dammnnnnn" when a fly honey would walk by, as fly honeys are prone to do on Fresh Prince.

For no particular reason, I made up a word for my catchphrase. That way, no one can say they've said it before, and no one can dispute the meaning. Think of Skeeter's "Honk! Honk!" from "Doug." That's just genius. On the surface, Skeeter is saying, "I'm in agreement, or I'm glad to see you." On a deeper level, it's a social commentary on the dangers of nuclear proliferation. True story.

My phrase is "Shebamzee," with a variation of "Shebam-o" when the situation calls for it.

Possible uses:
"Look at that pack of cougars groveling over the Twilight movie. Shebamzee!"
"We were just about to get down and dirty, when, shebamzee! She told me she was a he."
"Shebam-o! Those Jersey Shore cast members are a shebamzee away from reversing the theory of evolution."

I don't know about you, but this could be a landmark event not seen since the Fonz's "Heyyyyyy."
If you have a catchphrase of your own, please tell, and try to use it today in everyday conversation or in a blog post. It's for the children.

To discuss naming your offspring based on a TV show

Theo. Denise. Vanessa. Rudy. Sondra.

Would you want your kids named after characters in "The Cosby Show?" Capricorn said she would. Capricorn loooooves the Cosby Show, while I mostly enjoy Cosby's pudding pops and technicolor sweaters. But now she has announced she would want her children named after the characters. Perhaps she's kidding. Perhaps she's not.

But there's a larger question here. If you were to name your kids after child characters on one TV show, which would it be?

Some options:
Mark, Randy and Brad on "Home Improvement"
Lisa, Bart and Maggie, " The Simpsons"
D.J., Stephanie and Michelle (and Kimmy Gibbler?), "Full House"
J.T., Dana, Karen, Al, Mark and Brendan, "Step by Step"
Eddie, Laura, Steve, Richie, Judy (but only for a short time before she disappeared for no reason), "Family Matters"
Chris, Stewie and Meg, "Family Guy"
D.J., Darlene, Becky, "Roseanne"
L.C., Audrina, Hei... oh, nevermind

I think characters on "Doug" would be sweet: Doug, Skeeter, Patty, Roger... or maybe "Pete and Pete"-- there's Pete, and then there's that other one... Pete.

OK, maybe not. If I had to, I'd choose "Seventh Heaven"-- Matt, Mary, Lucy, Simon, Ruthie, Sam, David.... I'll admit this now: During the TV writer's strike last year, when nothing new was on, I got addicted to Seventh Heaven. Actually, I got my roommate addicted, too. I ended up watching just about every episode of the later seasons, up to the last episode. I almost got teary eyed.... Let's not talk about it...

Instead, which show would you choose?

To discuss a survey of middle school proportions

Several people- by several, I mean Teej and AmyXXOO, in particular- have now tagged me to do this survey thing, which reminds me of those chain e-mails you get that I used in high school to get to know people rather than actually talking to them (which takes a lot of effort. A lot.)
So here I am, doing one. It looks to be a good Saturday-esque post, anyway.


A. Attached or single ? I'm a week and a half into Attachedville, population Capricorn and me. Related note: One of my real life friends who lives in another part of the state had to ask me what Capricorn's real name is, because she only knew about Capricorn through the blog. That's either really sad or really funny. Decide.

B. Best friend ? Bailey. Second place: Jesus.

C. Cake or pie ? Ice cream cake is the best.

D. Day of choice ? There is an episode of "Doug" where he and Skeeter invent a day of the week. I swear I'm remembering this correctly. I think his neighbor, Bud Dunk, had an invention for it. I feel like you should know all this. Anyway, I choose that day.

E. Essential item ? Pants. I try not to leave home without them.

F. Favourite colour ? I left this spelling of "favorite" in to appease my Australian readers-- this means you, Amy. You Aussies and your funny spellings and your opposite seasons. Also: Blue.

G. Gummy bears or worms ? I used to really love those Swedish fish until I ate a whole box of them in one sitting and felt cherry death creep up my throat.

H. Hometown ? A Pa. town with no stoplights, a general store and no chain stores.

I. ( favourite ) Indulgence ? Needless electronics or Banana Republic clothes.

J. January or July ? July. January is December's redheaded stepchild.

K. Kids ? I do not have any that I'm aware of at this time.

L.Life isnt complete without ? God is the correct and appropriate answer. The funny answer is Shamrock Milkshakes from McDonalds each March.

M. Marriage date ? Did you know that I was supposed to be married for more than two years already?

N. Number of brothers and sisters ? One of each. I'm the middle child.

O. Oranges or apples ? Apples.

P. Phobias ? That a whole generation of kids now only know Mario Lopez as the host of America's Best Dance Crew/that Dancing with the Stars guy.

Q. Quotes? Charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: "Here's a confession: I'm in love with a man. What? I'm in love with a man... a man named God. Does that make me gay? Am I gay for God? You betcha." Count me in, Charlie. I'm all gay for God too.

R. Reasons to smile? Genital herpes commercials in which the girlfriend never seems upset that her boyfriend has herpes.

S. Season of choice ? Fall

T. Tag five people ? At this point, if you want to do this, do it. Or I'll punch you in the ovaries.

U. Unknown fact about me? The taste of bananas makes me gag.

V. Vegetable ? Is it in bad form to say Terry Shiavo? Good, cause I won't do that. Also: Corn.

W. Worst habit ? Saying inappropriate Helen Keller jokes.

X. X-ray or ultrasound ? I'm changing this question to read X-Men, Favorite? That would be Nightcrawler. Unless we're talking about making out with one of them. That would be Storm. Unless we're talking about who has the coolest power. That would be Wolverine. Unless we're talking about the best X-Men movie. That would be the first one. Unless we're talking about what would be my mutant power. That would be run-on sentences and appropriate use of the semi-colon.

Y. Your favourite food ? At the current moment, Nilla Wafers are causing my taste buds to giggle and gossip about the flavors to come.

Z. Zodiac sign ? Aquarius, which is only good if you want to sing "Age of Aquarius" with me. Which I'll do.