My mom is better than your mom.
Not in loving you, not in being there for you, not in telling you it'll be fine after you fake eloped in Mexico with some d-bag with a flesh-colored beard.(Spencer continues to be the worst person on the planet. Strict Shenaniganist agrees).
Yeah, my mom doesn't know you, so she couldn't possibly be better than your mom at those things.
But there's no way your mom would do this for you:
That's right. An entire holiday door decoration, made from scratch. I mentioned to my mom during her Thanksgiving visit that there's a holiday door decorating contest at my apartment complex. Without another word from me, she said, "OK, so what are we going to do?" That very night, we got fabric and she started to assemble this masterpiece, all from the inspiration of this caroler:
If you look closely, you can see that she used a photo of my face for the carolers face.
I don't see Carol Brady pulling that off. Or Vivian Banks. Or Ellen Griswold. Even Capricorn's mom, who folded my manpants and constantly offers me food, wouldn't dare attempt this.
It's a fact. My mom has already sewn up (get it?) the Mom of the Year award.
Now all I have to do is buy her a Christmas present.
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