To discuss Music I Loved Fridays: The. Song. Is. Mine.

It's been a long time since I've put up a Music I Loved Friday post, but let's get it going again. As a reminder, MILF is all about taking a look back at the music that I grew up with. It is not about your mom.

Who gets the honor this month?

I'm sorry that you seem to be confused. He belongs to me. The boy is mine.



You go, Brandy. No, YOU go, Monica. Will somebody just tell me who this damn boy belongs to?

It's June 1998. I'm about to start my sophomore year of high school, unaware yet that in a few months, Britney Spears would hit me baby one more time. Right now, the divas on the chart are Brandy and Monica.

Secretly, I had liked Monica's debut song, "Don't Take It Personal (Just One of 'Dem Days)" which came out when she was just 15. I was even younger, and so for all I knew, "one of 'dem days" was a girl who was in a bad mood. If you had asked me at the time, a period was nothing more than punctuation. Ah, youthful ignorance. I could have saved years of arguments and headaches with girls if I had only heeded Monica's advice and just realized women have one of 'dem days one week a month, or, in some cases, every week of every month.

Brandy was popular too, and why not, since her smile is wide enough to eat a banana sideways. But putting the two of them in the same song? I could barely handle Mariah Carey and Wanya Morris trying to out-oohahhhoohhaah each other on "One Sweet Day."

Looking back, there was no denying the power of "The Boy Is Mine." I mean, it was co-produced by Dallas Austin, and just look at who he went on to work with!

Since I was 15 at the time, I had no idea this song was based on a Paul McCartney/Michael Jackson duet, "The Girl is Mine," or as its now known, "The Girl Is Paul's by Default." I just thought Brandy and Monica had been fighting over some dude - probably like the Fresh Prince or something - and wanted to sing about it.

"The Boy Is Mine" spent 13 weeks on the top of the charts, which proves that at some point in 1998, you liked this song. You probably liked the video, which featured Mekhi Phifer before he went on to star in my cult favorite, Dawn of the Dead, in which he delivered a zombie baby from his pregnant zombie wife.

In hindsight, I'm not sure why the music video didn't have Mekhi asking for the girls to just get drunk and have a threesome, but I guess there are limits to what Carson Daly could show on "TRL." You know, back when MTV played music videos. Not that I can complain. I watch "16 and Pregnant" like it contains the secret to life.

Sadly in the years after, Brandy came out with a sequel, "The Hit-and-Run Is Mine," and is now more famously known as the sister of the guy who gave Kim Kardashian his flesh python in a sex tape. Monica has since carved out a career as "That girl who sang my prom theme" and is no doubt waiting for her invitation to "Dancing with the Stars."

To discuss MILF Friday: I did it all for the baked goods

It wouldn't be the last Friday of the month without Music I Loved Fridays. This time around, let's get our rock on:



You can take that cookie, and stick it up your yeah.

Flashback:
It's 1998. I'm tenth grade, and, like most of my peers, have been immersed in teen pop music for a year, from Backstreet to Brandy. And then, one day on TRL, it all changed... Now, back in time:

Girls like guys who weigh 140 pounds, wear braces and have a bowl cut, right? Right?

Maybe I should dress more like JC Chasez... That dude has got the look the ladies love... all I need is a white dress shirt and an awkwardly shaped nose... one nose down, one shirt to go.

Or maybe I should dress like this guy, Fred, who I saw on Total Request Live. You wouldn't believe it-- he has tattoos all over, a backward baseball cap and his last name is Hearse or Durd or something. Crazy. His bandmate wears black contacts to make him look like the devil-- I mean, these guys just are so hardcore! After all, these guys did that remake of "Faith," and made it all hardcore and whatnot-- they made George Michael's diddy into something us kids can relate to, because you got all inventive and screamed the lyrics! Rock n Roll Hall of Fame needs to polish off a plaque right now, because these guys gots skillz.

So Fred's in this band, Limp Noodle. No, wait, it was Flat Biscuit. Hot Pocket? I'd AOL search it, but this 52k modem is slooooowwww. Much faster than the 26k before it, though.

Limp Bizkit! That's it. Anyway, they've got this really catchy song that's so anti-pop, yo. It's called "Nookie." When I get old enough to tell you what "nookie" means, I'll let you know. I'm guessing it's some kind of baked good. I'd do it all for a brownie, I'll tell you that much. I'd fondle a pony for a muffin.

"I did it all for the nookie (come on) the nookie (come on)/So you can take that cookie and stick it up your (yeah)"

Fred, why on earth would I waste a perfectly good cookie by sticking it up my yeah? Well, it doesn't matter anyway, because all the girls seem to love you-- I bet one day you and Eminem will be competing over Christina Aguilera-- so I'll just take your advice and go with it.

I did it all for the nookie, ladies. Please act accordingly.

Billboard Top 5 songs of 1998:
1. Too Close Next
2. The Boy Is Mine Brandy & Monica
3. You're Still The One Shania Twain
4. Truly Madly Deeply Savage Garden
5. How Do I Live LeAnn Rimes

To discuss a new feature that will take you way back

In an attempt to overextend myself like the Saved by the Bell crew trying to mass produce Screech's Spaghetti Sauce, here's a new monthly feature, Music I Loved Friday, or MILF.
It's a look back at old-school songs of yesterdecade, remembering where I was and what I thought when the song came out. I probably hate the song now, but at the time, it was all the rage.
And what better way to start than with...

Baby One More Time! Here's the video, for those interested. I didn't embed it so you wouldn't have it unexpectedly blaring from your work computer.

Flashback:
It's January, 1999, the winter of my sophomore year of high school (commence groans by those older than me, and "dude, you're old" by those younger, like female Andy). I'm kicking back after school, watching music videos on this channel that used to play music videos, called MTV, now known as Reality World Television.* And what pops up on TRL, hosted by the affable Carson Daly?

Britney Spears? Who's this broad? Why is she so bubbly? And... wh...wha... whaaaahhh? She's grinding in high school hallways in a school girl outfit? I'm entranced! And I think she's singing about sexual relations... although 16 is a little young to be telling your boyfriend to hit you in bed.
As I stared past my ominous braces and through my thick glasses at the flickering screen, I was quite sure a superstar was before my eyes, although it would be hard for her to be better than that Destiny's Child group. I can't stop singing "No, No, No," although something bothers me about that lead singer. She looks like a real.... where was I?

Oh yeah, Britney Spears. Well, I'll give you a chance. This song is catchier than herpes at homecoming. And that pink sports bra is doing something for me, although I don't know exactly what- fortunately, I have sex ed class tomorrow, so I should find out soon.

I think good things will happen to this girl. She seems to love dancing too. Maybe she'll meet a nice boy dancer one day and have one... no, two! kids who can grow up with divorced and inebriated loving parents.

Billboard's Top Five Songs Around That Time:
1. Cher- Believe
2. TLC- No Scrubs
3. Monica- Angel of Mine
4. Whitney Houston- Heartbreak Hotel
5. Britney Spears- Baby One More Time

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What did you think when this song came out?

Thanks to those who checked out my new work blog (also on entertainment topics). Here's today's post, on Super Bowl stuff I wish would happen. Let me shamelessly ask you to add it to your reader. Your Google reader likes the gluttonous punishment. I promise to limit the mentions of the blog from now on.